Master Breastfeeding with ADHD Challenges - Episode 44

What's Up Wednesdays!
For moms with ADHD, breastfeeding can be a mental challenge, with feelings of restlessness and distraction overshadowing moments of connection. On today's episode let's explore the realities of breastfeeding with ADHD, offering understanding and strategies to help moms create a more positive experience. It blends practical tips with a mom's personal story, reassuring mothers that their struggles are normal and encouraging them to embrace their own unique path in breastfeeding. 

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Remember, as parents, do your best—there are no perfect parents, but countless ways to be loving and supportive. Signing off from the For Love of Parenting podcast. Thanks for listening. Until next time.

Transcript

Title: Master Breastfeeding with ADHD Challenges

Intro Summary

Breastfeeding is often portrayed as a serene, bonding experience between mother and baby, but for some moms with ADHD, the reality can feel vastly different. If you have ADHD, you might feel like your brain is constantly pulling you in a thousand directions. Sitting still for a feeding session may feel like an impossible task, and the mental chaos can overshadow those quiet moments you’ve been told to cherish. On today’s episode, I am going to explore tips for staying focused and overcoming the challenges of breastfeeding with ADHD. So, come on!

Podcast

Hello, for my love of parenting parents. Welcome back! Today, I will be continuing my discussion on ADHD as it relates to parenting. When coming up with a topic for today, I came across this story about a mom with ADHD and I thought that this would be a great story to share on my podcast, because maybe you are a breastfeeding mom with ADHD.

So, here is the story of A Mother's Journey: Breastfeeding with ADHD.

When I first found out I was pregnant, a whirlwind of emotions swept over me—joy, excitement, and a familiar undercurrent of anxiety. As a woman with ADHD, I knew my journey into motherhood would be different. There would be challenges, yes, but I had no idea that breastfeeding would be one of the most profound—and rewarding—experiences of my life.

The first weeks after my daughter, Ava, was born were an overwhelming blur. My ADHD, which had always been like a quiet hum in the background, suddenly roared to life. Sleepless nights, chaotic days, and the constant mental noise made it hard to focus on much of anything. Breastfeeding, which I had so looked forward to, felt like one more thing I couldn’t get right.

Ava had trouble latching, and I found myself spiraling into frustration, feeling like I couldn’t give her what she needed. I would sit there, baby at my breast, while my mind raced—reminding me of all the things I hadn’t done, all the ways I wasn’t enough. My brain bounced from one worry to the next, and I couldn’t sit still for more than a few minutes without feeling the itch to move, to do something else.

I felt like I was failing. I wanted to quit.

But every time I looked down at Ava’s tiny face, something shifted in me. She needed me, and in those quiet moments when we were skin-to-skin, I felt a calmness wash over me that I hadn’t experienced in years. I realized that breastfeeding wasn’t just about feeding her; it was about anchoring me in the present. Each session became a chance to connect—not just with her, but with myself.

I started using tools to help manage my ADHD during these feedings—simple things, like setting a timer, creating a comfortable space, and allowing myself to use that time to meditate or listen to music. It wasn’t perfect, and some days were harder than others, but slowly, I found my rhythm.

Over time, breastfeeding became a grounding force in my life. It was the one time during the day when I could quiet my mind and focus completely on the moment. It was where I learned patience, both with Ava and with myself.

As the months passed, Ava grew stronger and more independent, and so did I. Breastfeeding wasn’t just about nourishment; it became a symbol of resilience, of overcoming, of embracing imperfections. I’m proud to say that we made it through one year of breastfeeding—a milestone that felt unreachable in those early days.

For any mother with ADHD who feels like she’s not enough, know this: your journey is unique, but it is yours. There is strength in every struggle, and there is love in every latch. You are more than enough, just as you are.

This journey taught me to slow down, to breathe, and to trust in my body’s ability to do what it was meant to do. And for that, I will forever be grateful.

This story of this mom’s journey is not much different from any other mom who struggles to find her way with breastfeeding. I think we all can resonate with most of what this mom was expressing. For me with a daughter with ADHD, I started to wonder if she will have a similar experience with breastfeeding when she starts her family. 

We all know that breastfeeding is a rewarding and natural way to nourish your baby, but for mothers with ADHD, it can present unique challenges. Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) can make it difficult to stay focused, maintain routines, and manage the demands of breastfeeding, especially in the early weeks. The good news is that with the right strategies and support, it’s possible to successfully breastfeed while managing ADHD symptoms. Today, I am going to explore tips for staying focused and overcoming the challenges of breastfeeding with ADHD.

But first let define or try to understand ADHD and breastfeeding a little better. As I have mentioned in my previous episodes this month, ADHD affects attention, impulsivity, and self-regulation. This can make it harder for some moms to stay engaged during long feeding sessions or navigate the unpredictable nature of breastfeeding on demand. For mothers with ADHD, this might include:

• Difficulty focusing during breastfeeding, leading to distractions.
• Restlessness or discomfort when sitting still for extended periods.
• Challenges with adapting to the spontaneity of on-demand breastfeeding.

Some strategies that you might want to try are:

1. Create a Calm, Distraction-Free Feeding Space

If your environment is full of distractions, it can be hard to focus. Try to find a quiet corner where you can breastfeed with minimal interruptions. Keep everything you need close by, so you’re not tempted to get up during the session.

• Choose a comfortable chair or cushion in a quiet area where you can sit for a while.
• Keep essential breastfeeding items nearby, like water, snacks, and burp cloths, so you’re prepared for impromptu feedings.
• Reduce distractions by limiting electronic devices like your phone or TV when feeding, allowing you to focus on your baby.

Having a few go-to spots for on-demand feedings will help you settle in quickly, no matter where you are in the house.

2. Engage Your Mind During Feedings

For moms with ADHD, staying still during breastfeeding can be challenging, especially when feeding is spontaneous or on-demand. To help manage this:

• Keep a small activity on hand, like a book, a puzzle, or a knitting project, to engage your mind while breastfeeding.
• Consider mindful breastfeeding by tuning into your baby’s movements, sounds, and expressions. Focusing on these sensory details can keep you grounded in the present moment.
• Use breastfeeding positions that allow you to move or change positions, such as side-lying or walking around with your baby in a sling or carrier.

Staying mentally engaged during feedings helps manage restlessness while also fostering a positive breastfeeding experience.

3. Embrace Flexibility with On-Demand Breastfeeding or Use a Combination of Building a Routine with Feedings. As we know, ADHD thrives on structure. And in the breastfeeding world feeding your baby on-demand and not on a schedule is best for breastfeeding because you are working with your baby’s cues for hunger. In the beginning, breastfeeding will be more sporadic but over time you will begin to see more of a pattern of when your baby is hungry and ready to eat.

So, in the beginning try to anticipate that your baby will eat about every 2-3 hours but give yourself flexibility if your baby shows hunger cues before that time frame. Remember, On-demand breastfeeding doesn’t follow a set schedule. Instead, focus on responding to your baby’s hunger cues:

• Watch for signs like rooting, sucking on hands, or fussiness, which indicate your baby is ready to feed. This reduces the need for rigid schedules.
• Use visual cues, like a baby app, to track feedings and monitor which breast you used last, if that’s helpful.
• Allow for a flexible routine that adapts to your baby’s changing needs, rather than setting strict times for feedings.

The freedom of breastfeeding on demand can be more manageable for mothers with ADHD, as it accommodates the natural ebb and flow of your baby’s hunger patterns. However, if you find that on-demand feedings do not work for you, the use a combination of setting a schedule to know that between this time and this time, my baby may wake for feeding – and then watch for your baby’s hunger cues to let you know. During this time don’t over stress or over think about the exact time that your baby will show hunger. Instead, go back to strategy number two of engaging your mind by keeping a small activity at hand or even try resting, mindfulness, eating a nutritious meal (which is strategy number 5) to distract you until your baby shows signs of is feeding readiness.

4. Ask for Help and Build a Support System

Breastfeeding on demand can sometimes feel overwhelming, especially when paired with ADHD symptoms, but you don’t have to do it alone. Consider:

• Reaching out to a lactation consultant to troubleshoot any breastfeeding challenges and provide guidance on balancing ADHD with on-demand feeding.
• Joining a support group for moms who share similar experiences, where you can exchange ideas, share struggles, and gain practical tips.
• Talking to your healthcare provider if you need help managing ADHD medications while breastfeeding, or if you need support with ADHD symptoms in general.

Building a solid support system will make your breastfeeding journey smoother and less stressful.

5. Take Care of Yourself

It’s crucial to prioritize your own well-being. To manage both breastfeeding and ADHD:

• Prioritize rest whenever possible, even if it means taking short naps when your baby sleeps.
• Engage in mindfulness exercises or relaxation techniques like deep breathing or meditation to help calm your mind and reduce stress.
• Make sure you stay hydrated and nourished, as breastfeeding requires extra calories and hydration.

Self-care will help you stay energized and focused, making it easier to manage both breastfeeding and ADHD.

6. Celebrate Small Wins

Every breastfeeding journey is unique, and for mothers with ADHD, it’s essential to celebrate the small victories along the way. Acknowledge:

• The little milestones, such as successfully breastfeeding on demand for a few weeks or overcoming a challenge.
• The bond you’re creating with your baby during breastfeeding, despite the ups and downs.
• The growth you experience as you navigate both motherhood and ADHD.

Recognizing these wins will boost your confidence and make the process feel more rewarding.

So, in closing breastfeeding with ADHD presents its own set of challenges, but by adopting some or all of these strategies, you can nourish your baby without the stress that ADHD presents. By creating calm spaces, engaging your mind during feedings, and building a strong support system, you’ll find ways to make breastfeeding more manageable. Remember to take care of yourself, stay flexible, and celebrate every small achievement—you’re doing an incredible job! Until next time, take care of yourself.

Tags

ADHD moms, breastfeeding with ADHD, new mom struggles, ADHD and motherhood, breastfeeding tips, mom focus, parenting with ADHD, distracted breastfeeding, ADHD challenges, bonding with baby, breastfeeding advice, motherhood.